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Pandora Scooter: Blog

Walk It

Posted on August 30, 2010 with 0 comments

 

They say if you say it, it will come true
Just ‘putting it out into the ether’ brings it closer to you.
They say if you think it, it will be realized
That all you need to do is visualize it in your mind’s eyes.
All them they’s who say these things
They say them while disclaiming that if it didn’t come true
If IT didn’t get realized
Then it was you who didn’t deeply believe, think, or visualize
It’s never the practice, it’s always the practitioner who is at fault
And proof of it ‘working’ always hangs by a frayed string of dental floss
“OMG one day I was pulling into the parking lot at Target and I thought, “I want a first row space.” And right then one came open and I got it!  See?”
or
“You know, one year I was so depressed, I didn’t leave my apartment for a month and I was on the kitchen floor, crying my eyes out begging for someone to reach out and show that they cared when suddenly the door bell rang and it was my cute next door neighbor who just said she wanted to stop in since she hadn’t seen me around at all.”
(And no she didn’t hear me crying through the wall!)
or
“Hey…I’m a cancer survivor and I did it by eating nothing but grapefruit and visualizing the grapefruit seeds eating away at my cancer.”
!
“Hey, don’t cough at that, Pandora!”
!
Ok, well, don’t cough at the woman who smoked a pack a day from 13 to 86 and died getting hit by a car in an intersection - NOT from asphyxiation.
 
I do love the spiritual,
but coincidence and statistics
are vitally empirical
Chance and mind tricks
‘Cause Correlative doesn’t mean Causal.
Correlative doesn’t mean Causal.           
That’s to say that just because two events are butted up against each other doesn’t mean that the second ass came out of the first one’s hole.   
Like the fact that when I’m waiting for a train to come I count from 42 backwards and usually the train comes within that time frame – that’s correlative – my counting didn’t do anything but pass the time, the train would’ve come even if I’d just decided to rhyme
Random words
Like turds
And curds of whey
Anyway, I wish people who get this through their head.
Correlative doesn’t mean Causal, instead
It just means one thing happened after the other
And statistically, the likelihood that the one made the other happen is so
Infinitesimally eensie-weensie
So, leptonically teeny
That it would be more likely to guess that the mere fact that you didn’t die that minute (a much higher chance at any given moment in your day) is what caused the ‘amazing ‘ thing to happen to you. 
So, no, I’m sorry, it isn’t because they’re Subway sandwiches that you are losing weight
It’s the fact that you’re expending more calories than those you ate
That’s the math
The fiction is that it has something to do with Subway or Lean Cuisine
10 Ways to lose inches in days screams the headline on the magazine
The fiction is that there is some kind of interlacing logic to the way things unfold
When really there’s just the cards that you hold and the way that you play ‘em
And everything else is up to chance, to circumstance, to lady luck
Who doesn’t give a fuck about how much you wish for things
Lady Luck is fickle, and tickles and tempts us to think that she’s reliable
When we know she’s not
But she’s so hot, not one cares
They just feel her long thick wavy hair
And commonsense just disappears into thin air
Yeah, Lady Luck runs this show
And the sooner you accept this the sooner you’ll know
That you can woo her and appease her with all sorts of gifts
But ultimately, it’s her magic hands that control the twists and turns
The loves and spurns
The highs and lows
The yeses and no’s…
 
 
But there is one possible loop hole
One thing Lady Luck has doesn’t have a hold on, she can’t totally control
It’s not easy, but it’s almost a sure thing
It’s not for the lazy or the second-guessing neurotic
It’s not for the grey people or the ever-blessing romantic
It’s just simple and plain and straightforward, no shit:
It’s just this:
Walk It.
You wanna lose weight: burn more calories than you eat
Walk It
You wanna lose debt: spend less than you make
Walk It
You wanna find love, follow up with every person you meet
Walk It
You wanna love what you do, stop settling for one cake
Walk it
Plot out the route, then put on your shoes and
Walk it
Dream High and Think Big, what do you have to lose? just
Walk it
Cut the credit cards,
Discard the lard,
Call old friends,
Go ‘til you end
At the finish line you choose
What do you have to lose?
You could lose your neuroses
You could lose your floundering
You could lose your sense of being lost
You could lose your second guessing
You could lose your treading water
You could lose your sense of drowning
You could lose settling for less that you want
You could lose the chance you’ll be sitting regretting
That you didn’t do more
That you didn’t take the bull by the horns
That you didn’t go balls to the wall
That you didn’t ignore the potential free fall.
Just walk it.
Stop complaining
Stop bitching
Stop cogitating
Stop itching
Just walk it.
Take that first step – commit
Walk it
Just one little step
Walk it
See how it feels
Walk it
Stop with the bullshit
 
Consider this your personal invitation
To live your life with crystal clear intention
With fabulous conviction
Consider this the kick in your ass
That reminds you to live your life at last
Live your life
Don’t let your life live you
‘Cause for all you know by tomorrow you’ll be through
So you better giddy up before you’re undone
Walk It
Commit
Walk It
Commit
Walk It
Commit
And Walk It.

 

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